Friday, March 30, 2007

now we use SEX to SELL COOKIES and other stuff

“Is it really that big?”
Rediffmail advertisement. The double-entendre is quite apparent; a woman putting on lipsticks while she tells her excited friend in a sultry manner about Raju’s “thing” being that big, does make me laugh…lips and “thing”…ho ho ho!! She even claims to have seen “it”.
Then they show a surd who is not ready to believe that Raju’s is that big.
Then they show Raju, a guy of short stature and a baby face, peeing in the loo. A man next to him greets him while looking at his “thing”… [Now this is really a very DIRECT hit about what they’re otherwise only stating implicitly. This really spells out what they have on their mind…tell me something guys, you don’t pee using your e-mail account, do you? What the heck was that man staring at Raju’s lily for while he peed? And he even gives a smile while looking at his…]
Finally the secret is revealed “it’s not big. It’s unlimited”; it’s Raju’s e-mail account.
NOW TELL ME SOMETHING!!
Why would any guy be so interested in knowing about another guy having a huge “thing”? Tell me, has nature been so miserly with them that they find themselves so inadequate and small OR are they just homosexuals.
The ad ends with the line, “big enough for anything”. OOOHHHH MANNNN!!! If you consider the primal-hint that the ad gives in the beginning, what the heck are they talking about…? I understand that these days some women have become really greedy but this is ridiculous…Why a “man” at all, a horse would do better in that case!
You Rediff people are absurd. As always, please excuse.
Thankfully, at the end of the ad, they show that people were actually misunderstanding the size of Raju’s e-mail account for the size of his “thing”…and we do thank God for the fact that it wasn’t an ad about 6£^[$ enlargement (like the freaking spam mails that we keep receiving these days) like it hinted in the beginning.
SHOCK VALUE SELLS!! SEX SELLS…There are other ads that initially look like ads for an aphrodisiac and/or condoms …but they’re actually advertisements for COOKIES!! [MILANO and DARK FANTASY if you remember!!]…now you need sex to sell food!! Lame Man!!
The ad world is so mixed up that if I’m watching an advertisement for a condom for the first time, more than half way through, I’m almost sure that it’ll be an ad for a bloody new cookie…not till the time they say it loud…Kamasutra or Moods…or whatever…am I ready to believe that it’s a condom’s ad…cookies and condoms, soon there’ll be a technological breakthrough and there’ll be no difference between the two.
But tell me something, I’ve had a rediff account for the past 5years and I have hardly deleted any mails from it. It would take me a whole day or two to go through all of them and the stats show that I’m using only 14% of the total 2Gb assigned space)…So wasn’t it unlimited already?…bloody publicity gimmick.
If you still disagree and say that now you can send huge attachments… tell me something sister/bro, have you ever tried to attach a file of size around 3-4mb? It takes not less than 15-30mins on a broad band connection. Who the heck will be bold enough to try and attach a bigger file?
So it really doesn’t matter if it’s unlimited now…it’s still the same.

DISCLAIMER- No one can hold me personally responsible for whatever trash I write on my blog. I mostly start writing after midnight…at that time of night, it’s no longer me…it’s the “MONSTER”…this is a sobriquet bestowed on me by an alien!

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