Saturday, October 06, 2012

Me and Hobbes

I didn't understand all the brouhaha about Calvin and Hobbes till I got hooked on to it myself. Well it's been quite a while since I felt like writing. I've been filling posts for the heck of it but they don't give me that sense of completion anymore. Undoubtedly The Bible would've sufficed at such times but I just happened to be trying to explore the collection of Calvin and Hobbes strips I accidentally copied from Danny's computer.

Obviously Calvin knows somethings about the world, way more than a little kid of six (?I don't remember his age), who's least interested in studies, would know. Also his vocabulary seems way overdeveloped; strangely, that has irritated me on more than one occasion.

I can't understand who Hobbes is? That is a question that has, and still does, haunt me many a night. Honestly, as an Indian, for who English is not the first language, pronunciation can be a bit of a problem and I still don't know if I pronounce Hobbes correctly. I pronounce it as "Hob-bez". It is apparent that Hobbes is stuffed-toy tiger, from whom, Calvin is inseparable. We all know that for Calvin, Hobbes is alive, while for the rest of the world he's a stuffed toy. His parents too understand Hobbes' importance in his life. They even know that he thinks of Hobbes as a living, breathing, interacting entity but pass it off as mere childishness. Honestly I think they're happy about the latter as it probably saves them the guilt of not having another child to give him company; who knows what reasons they have for not having another. They just know that Calvin is always talking to and playing with Hobbes when he's not at school.

There's the rest of the world with the perils and pains of the reality and there's Calvin with his wacky visions, transmogrifier and last but not least, Hobbes. When I started to read C&H, I couldn't understand what Hobbes signified (I still can't and this has transmogrified me into a curious neuron). He mostly talks like someone older than Calvin. In the initial strips he talks about girls and kisses not very infrequently. He responds to Calvin's queries like a grown-up mostly; at times, not a very literate grown up. At the same time he seems not much older than Calvin when they're both scared out of their wits sitting on the bed at night, wondering if the monsters under it will attack them. At times they even have bitter fights, are mean to one another.

I cannot even understand Hobbes' size. Obviously for Calvin he's a big, tall tiger that walks on two legs while for the rest, he's a stuffed toy smaller in size than Calvin himself. Why does Hobbes appear so big to Calvin when in reality, he's so small? But then again, after reading C&H, who cares about reality, I just envy the bond that the two share.

At first I thought Hobbes was an extension of Calvin's dad's persona. From the comic, I get some clue that dad and Calvin's relation is not as plain and disconnected as it might appear to most. After all he's the only person Calvin approaches with regarding "the election" for dad's tenure as "dad". The way his dad responds to him sometimes seems interesting to me, it's really not the same as mom, but then again, maybe this hypothesis is not flawless.

Maybe Calvin had a brother who died or left home or disappeared when Calvin was much younger and Calvin has some faint memory of him that he transmogrified Hobbes into...some kind of an his elder brother and best friend. That theory has obvious caveats as Calvin's parents would've been much lenient with him had that happened...shesh!! That hypothesis is flawed as well but then again...who cares about flaws...when you're reading Calvin and Hobbes...flaw is strength. The only thing that got to me was how his parents freak out when Calvin loses Hobbes once and how they go out in the dead of the night to find it. However that might just be because they know how attached Calvin is to it. 

Remember Blake's lines 
"Tyger! Tyger! burning bright 
In the forests of the night, 
What immortal hand or eye 
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?"

...Wish I had Hobbes with me right now to talk to. Meanwhile, I'm haunted by the same question that riddles my mind day in and day out; who is he?

Friday, September 28, 2012

wtf


“Life may have no meaning. Or even worse, it may have a meaning of which I disapprove.”


Ashleigh Brilliant

Thursday, August 02, 2012

Match-fixing Vs Match-throwing; Olympics and Cricket

 If you're Indian, did you know what "throwing one's game" meant? I just read about it in The Hindu that eight badminton players have been disqualified in the Olympics for "throwing their game".

 I read on just to understand what it meant. It meant some players, who were already sure to move on to the next stage in the contest (even if they lost that particular match that they were playing), deliberately lost the game by committing deliberate fouls (of course coz it didn't stop them from moving on anyway).

 I quote "Chairman of the London Organising Committee of the Olympic and Paralympic Games (LOCOG) Sebastian Coe attacked the performances. Branding the behaviour “depressing” and “unacceptable,” he said, “Who wants to sit through something like that?” 

 We in India are familiar with something else and kinda similar; Matchfixing. Ha ha ha ha! I'm sure now you all understand what I mean. I reckon that matchfixing is worse because there you don’t even ensure that you’re qualified for the bigger game. You screw up things in the field, sometimes in the finals of the biggest events, let your team/nation down and laugh your way to the bank unconscionably.

 Ah! we even have a fun movie on this. Watch the Hindi movie "99" starring  Kunal KhemuBoman IraniSoha Ali Khan and Cyrus Broacha

 Our cricket crazy nation is famous bookies and and unending supply of people that bet on them. Last year I was nothing short of shocked to learn how common and rampant betting is in cricket. Bookies launder money and who are the investors; the common man. Our young Indian blood working in MNCs and corporate sector invest relatively small sums like Rs 10K, 20K, “invest” in lakhs, the money goes to the bookies, they go to the players with their crores and VOILA! Match fixed. The winners distribute their profits, the losers lose their bucks.

 May God take care of Anna Hazare and keep him safe.

Monday, July 30, 2012

gatecrashed Indian Olympic march and other trash



Even if she wasn’t wearing the red shirt to hog the limelight, the mystery woman, gatecrasher of the Indian Olympic march, Madhura Nagendra would've been spotted occupying much of the camera frame owing to her rather large posterior. She ended up doing the opposite of what she probably intended to; now she's infamous.


I didn't even know what the term gatecrashing meant till it happened at some White House party a few years ago. It's a term I've not heard Indians use till recently. We Indians have people "gate crashing" wedding parties, if no one finds out the gate crashers make merry, if they get caught, we beat the crap out of them...and let-out the frustrations of the complicated arranged-marriage system which afflicts tons of mental and financial agony to generations of the bride's and the groom's family, on the blessed day. 


Anyway, Madhura Honey, the mystery woman, the gatecrasher, at the Olympic march of the Indian contingent, is the woman many Indians want an extreme punishment for (the usual pogrom mentality). Ah! that explains the sporadic and recurrent communal riots here.


It is just so easy to infuriate us over some matters Vs some others when the two are happening at the same time.


Some matters over the others eh!! What is this guy talking about?
Here goes:


From what I read from comments on NEWS websites, Indians are so infuriated about this that their comments on the issue have turned absurdly grotesque. 


We can't discredit the fact that the gatecrasher was an Indian, an over-excited Indian, just like some people who are posting comments about her. We've first gotta accept that there's something inherently wrong with the way we Act and the way we React.




The Indian Olympic Association (IOA) has lodged a complaint to the London Organising Committee of the Olympic and Paralympic Games (LOCOG) about allowing this woman to gatecrash. IOA is shouting “You should’ve stopped her. How did this happen? There could’ve been a security breach…blah blah blah blah”.


Sure the issue is not irrelevant. The gatecrasher should not have been allowed and there could have been a security breach. I hope that is an eye-opener for LOCOG. However they say that it's not really a topic  to rouse "breach in security" topic since Madhura was a part of the dance contingent inaugural by Danny Boyle. Therefore she had all the security clearances. Makes sense to me. 


However the IOA is given a kind of reaction that make you wonder what they're up to. Do they have an ulterior motive? heh heh heh heh!! Sure seems like.


You see by creating a noise over an issue on which they can't be held responsible and throw the blame on somebody else, they're quietly sneaking away from another issue that should send them to the gallows; they supplied inferior kits to the Indian Olympics participants. The contract went to some company by the name Dida.


I've played basket at a Government Sports Complex for a few years, I still visit sports stores that sell equipment and dresses for sports and I don't think DIDA is a popular brand, if at all known. I've come across Shiv Naresh, which seems kinda funny a name for a sports company. Yeah imagine a sports goods company in the west by the name Jesus Christ: yay! look at my new Jesus Christ swimming trunk or Jesus Christ football, Jesus Christ! But what the heck,  Shiv Naresh company makes stuff that most sports persons in India wear and it's well known, at least they're honest about the quality and price of their goods. So what if their Cat emblem is copied from Slazenger, at least they're not running to supply their stuff to the Indian Olympians.


WTF is DIDA anyway, it just seems like some wannabe name picked up from the middle of aDIDAs (“Adidas” if you couldn't read that).


When players start to complain about kits, that too once they've reached the venue and are about to begin their competition with the best players in the world who are using the best gear available in the world, you sit back and wonder "wtf is this IOA doing? Are they ensuring that all the hard-work of our Indian players, many a time in less than perfect conditions, goes down the drain?"


Goddamit, they're supplying ill-fitting clothes, wrong sizes and inferior material to the Olympic contingent!!


Who's gonna make a hue and cry about this?  Heh heh heh! Or is it that DIDA got the contract by greasing some IOA palms heh heh heh...as is usual of anything that happens here. I don't know, I don't know, I'm just suspicious now, now that they players are crying foul. What is this if not sabotage? First project that they're doing a lot for training the players, then slash their throats at the arena and leave quietly. 


I wouldn't have raised my eyebrow at DIDA (even its name sucks) so long as it had come up to the Olympic standards. Unfortunately we have a tendency to promote mediocrity, bribery and red-tapism but at the Olympics, greasing palms or being some big-shots son/daughter just doesn't get you gold, like it does in day to day life here (or even silver or even bronze or even a qualifier)...Ah! Maybe it gets you contracts with IOA.


But I have faith in the Indian players, they'll get medals despite these corrupt bastards (oh! that's not even a bad word anymore so relax!)


So it's not just the Indian Olympic march that was gatecrashed, so was probably the contract to supply them the tools through which they are supposed to show their talents; what a shame.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Good morning sunshine


http://www.hindustantimes.com/India-news/NorthIndia/Jalandhar-civil-hospital-lets-newborn-die-over-Rs-200/Article1-895891.aspx
Now let's talk some more about our public health system. The gentlemen running/ working in hospitals in Patiala (an hour's drive from Chandigarh) removed a newborn baby from the incubator (at a Government run hospital) because the father could not pay Rs 200/- (USD 3.5). 

http://www.hindustantimes.com/India-news/NorthIndia/SP-s-son-held-for-assault-on-African-student/Article1-884907.aspx
 I don't understand what Yannick Nihangaza (23) of Burundi thinking, if he actually instigated the brawl, due to which he's lying in a state of coma in Punjab. He probably didn't know the level of ferocity his attackers would garner owing to his black skin and our Indian abhorrence of it. He probably didn’t watch too much TV which is clogged with ads of how dark-skinned people are losers and the ‘treatment’ of the condition by skin-whitening creams.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Anupama in the PGI: We need reforms


After 4 days, Anupama succumbed to the accident as well as apathy of City Beautiful Chandigarh's Public Medical Care system, epitomized by the PGI (Post Graduate Institute of Medical Research and Sciences). Anupama was a 17 year old girl whose leg got run-over by a negligent CTU (Chandigarh Transport Undertaking) bus-driver (WHOA! Imagine that kinda pain). Negligent bus-drivers are bad enough but negligent Health Care System is worse. The system at the PGI is so overburdened that doctors just can't attend to all the lynched, broken and mauled people lying everywhere in the trauma center.

Doctors are not very sensitive to patients crying in pain; how can they be, they're right in the center of the din all the time and anybody would get desensitized to noises. After all, they have to do their job and not go mad.

Even my real sister and her husband, both of who are doctors have a hectic life despite the fact that they work in a rural area, the kind of a place where there's a desperate need for more doctors but they just don't want to work in places that compromise any material comfort and live spartan lives. Why should they do charity anyway, most of them are bright city folk that have studied medicine in some modern city and well understand the charisma (even the pain) of their profession. Almost all of them have had their parents pay their fee through their noses. It is bound to be difficult to forget all that and go serve the poor. Sorry to digress.

Anyway, the medical staff at the PGI is second to none in the country. The problem is, as like all other spheres of out country, the excessive population. There are just not enough doctors to take care of the everyone at the trauma center. I have had a personal experience of the scenario. 

In 2008, a fully loaded Haryana Roadways bus ran over my fathers foot and pulverized his toes. Fortunately there was an acquaintance of ours around a Police Jeep took dad to the GMCH (Government Medical College and Hospital) in Sector 32, Chandigarh. There the doctors bandaged his foot and referred him to the PGI as they didn't have the expertise to deal with the case. At the PGI, a few Chandigarh Police officials make my half-conscious father to sign a document that said that the accident was all my father's fault and he didn't hold the bus-driver responsible for the act. I don't know if this was done to extort money out of the driver to set him free or the driver was known to some police-wala. Anyway, at the PGI we waited for 12 hours before dad was taken into surgery. All the while we did all we could to "influence" the docs in emergency to tend to him (ah! it's in our blood eh!). When one senior doctor answered the call by one of the ex-directors of the PGI telling him to be quick in treating my father, he replied in frustration "I am sorry sir, there are so many patients here, I just cannot deal with the case immediately." 

Trauma Center, the name speaks for itself. It's traumatic for everyone present there, the patients, people accompanying them and as well as the doctors and the nurses. I however cannot understand why Anupama was left for three days without so much as her bandaged being changed. As is with the educated elite class of doctors and their system, in today's newspaper, there is a detailed report of what all the Trauma Center claims it did for the girl, refuting all blame of negligence and I know no one cares about my gut feeling but from the PGI officials say about it, it's like they know that such things happen at times so let's have a proforma to present in court. They're not even sorry that the girl died. They appear upset that the case has been sensationalized. Though one cannot blame them for being upset about media sensationalism, the manner in which they are retaliation to this is just plain unconscionable. 

The end result speaks for itself. Since gas-gangrene spreads pretty quickly so the fact the girl died of it speaks volumes about the care she was given. Had it been detected in time, it wouldn't have cost her her life, though the infected area of her leg, most probably, would have been amputated. The given fact is that they just did not tend to her case till the time the realized that gangrene had set in and by then it must have spread  

PGI is a living breeding ground for dangerous microbes. In the days that followed my fathers operation, he suffered post-operative infection by the notorious MRSA (methicillin resistant Staphylococcus aureus), a bacteria that is resistant to many antibiotics and causes blood poisoning and death, as well as Pseudomonas aeruginosa, another bacteria (that is not as dangerous as MRSA) but my dad survived. Gas gangrene is caused by a bacteria called Clostridium perfringens. We have to understand that these bacteria can be commonly found in the soil all around us, like the tetanus bacteria. Mind it that if tetanus infection sets in, it is 100% fatal, so if you get cut, it's a great idea to spend 20 rupees for a tetanus toxoid injection and not take chances (it's effective for 6 months anyway). Gas gangrene spreads quickly and is difficult to treat, amputation can be a big possibility.

So when the news said that gangrene had set into Anupama's leg, I wondered if she'd survive. From the day this girl met with the accident , I was surprised she'd survived, from the news updates in the days that followed about her condition (apart from the fact that girl was molested in sector 26 and there were other news of first degree murders in the city etc etc), my alimentary canal kept wrenching and telling my mind that this girl was not gonna make it. Bullshit with gut feeling, it was just a prediction based on personal experience of the condition of our government hospitals.

Is there gonna be some reform by the administration and the hospital to ensure that such tragedies will not occur again or is this just another life that got lost in thousands of others. The problem is that we all get used to bad things fairly quickly. Somebody gets molested, we say "shit! that's terrible." But the news follows in the days to come, our concern dwindles. After all we know that the police is always reluctant to lodge reports of crimes, we know there are goons all around, we know that the city is not exactly safe near midnight, we know that people swear on each other on roads and get into brawls in cafes, we know that there are country made pistols owned by many in the city, we know we all racist but who cares...pehele bhi chalta tha, ab bhi chal raha hai...chalne do. 

 Sad that the parents of the girl had lost two children before this and now are childless.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

This day




Wow! Awesome, today I just happened to be glancing through old chats on FB that I had with my wife. Of course we weren’t married then, we weren’t even seeing each other, rather we used to meet occasionally with a few common friends.

From the conversation it is so clear that something was brewing. In those conversations, there are insinuations attraction, repulsion and absolute denial of the former. I skimmed through it, thought of our day-to-day life these days and giggled. One of the days that we conversed was the 5th of June when last year we were planning a trip to Mcleodganj. Actually Mcleodganj was just one of the options. Funny that exactly a year on, we were there on our honeymoon.

At times you need to look back on the days that were so carefree, when there was no serious paraphernalia attached to the relation, when the relation itself was at a point of inception.

These were times when days passed before you conversed before sat to wonder what’s happening on the other end. There were people we disliked in each other’s lives that we couldn’t openly tell each other about and just shrugged our shoulders and said “How does it affect me; let it be.”

Then our lives began to intertwine and we fell deeply in love. Our eyes opened up to so many new things. Man! We literally had to battle our way through the opposition to get married. The real world turned out to be nastier than we thought and it changed us through and through. I don’t think we’re the extra-sweet, carefree people anymore that we were a year ago.

I find it rather amusing that we were like that and I am glad, almost proud that we took each other seriously enough to have made it through to this day. 

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Good morning Chandigarh



What's embellishing the local newspapers recently:
 A girl molested in sec 26 by a dozen guys (Guwahati we're giving you competition), accidents in 43, 18 and everywhere, first-degree murders, second-degree murders, murder MMSs, wife-beatings, suicides, gun-fights, road-rage, break-ins, cases of harassment, insensitive police and when you read all that in Humid weather, makes me wonder if this is what the so-called Hell is like.

Tuesday, July 03, 2012

Friday, June 29, 2012

Surprise

It was quite a pleasant surprise when my guide ordered a cake and some eatables on my birthday last year. Equally surprised were the rest of my labmates because he refrains from indulging in such acts. He never remembers birthdays and even if is reminded of any, politely wishes and resumes his work. So it definitely was shocking that he arranged for this.

I joined the lab on the 2nd of January 2006 as a project assistant. I stayed for a year and three months and rejoined as a PhD student a year later. I what he said on the first day of my joining. He said "You've been selected because the interview panel found you to be worthy, so I am warning you not to abscond in a few weeks or months time. Stay here at least for a year, get your experience, clear you scholarship and then join PhD wherever you want after that."

I remember that I couldn't really perform that well in my project assistantship. I could generate ideas but my hands weren't good. The problem was that I had absolutely no self-confidence. In retrospect, I'd say that everyday I'd prepare to fail.

One day, the HOD from my alma mater Thapar University, where I did my MSc from, sent a message to my guide through Dr. Anand Bacchawat asking how I was doing and saying that I was a good lad. There were so many other instances withing IMTECH of people praising me in front of my guide. I remember one evening my guide looked me in the eye and said "Hmmmm!! seems like except me, the rest of the world things you're good." Many aspects of life changed for me during my stay here. 2006 also happens to be the year that I started blogging, opened up a bit and gained confidence. 

When it was time to leave in March 2007, I was down and out; both emotionally and career-wise. The first-half of 2007 was tortuous but the second-half was life-changing. I joined GRE coaching, realized my potential, gained more confidence, worked at Pearson, worked at PGI, got a decent GRE score, scored awesome in TOEFL and cleared both ICMR and CSIR PhD scholarship exams.

In 2008 after forgoing my plan to pursue PhD abroad because of dad's ill-health, I joined IMTECH under the guidance of Dr. D Sarkar, my guide. He told me that if I wanted to join him, he'd keep me in the Epo project and that it was a risky affair and that if at the end of my tenure, I'd have nothing in hand, I should neither blame him nor feel about the others doing well (which he knew they will in the Mtb project).

The first two years were a torture, then I got a breakthrough managed to refold the pain-in-the-butt Epo. Strange as it may seem, most of my big results initially came when boss was out-of-town and I was at my tweaking best without his interference. After that he changed his stance towards me.

Of course my personal-life problems kept plaguing my work for a while. Thankfully boss knew that everything would be alright once I get married and settle down a bit. He himself mellowed down with time.

I got married three weeks ago. In all this time, he's been very adjusting with all the nerve-wrecking problems I faced to materialize my marriage to my sweetheart. Phew! We finally made it despite all the problems and my guide made things easier for me on the career side of things.

In all these years, he's changed, I've changed and our impression about each other has changed. Life's tough but life's good  :)

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Padmashree for Dr. Batra

Doctor Batra runs a chain of clinics that mainly cater to cosmetic issues of the rich and the upper middle-class. The clinic is mainly known for its hair-fall treatment. One wonders that if his treatments works such wonders, why did he recently venture into a hair-transplant procedure as well (well! whatever it takes to get the hair back).

Let's forget about that for a while and see what else he does. He loves getting his pictures clicked with the rich and the famous that adorn the walls of his clinics. One wonders why; cheap publicity?

Then he loves clicking picture. Nobody stops a doc from clicking pictures right? Heck no! But to put up the pictures as an exhibit? Well, if he has the means to, then why not. What does he do with the money? Well he donates it to for animal welfare run by Maneka Gandhi...oops! Political connection. He also holds musical concerts and other such stuff to raise charity for widows and cancer patients, which is a good thing but one wonders if doing that gets you a Padmashree.

Why did he get a Padmashree, the 4th highest civilian award in India  for his contribution to homeopathy?  Has he helped the poor and the downtrodden with that knowledge? I haven't really heard of him healing those and I'm sure that the last thing the needy, sick and dying are more concerned about a square meal a day and a roof on the head than hair on their head.

Anyway, since he has been awarded, let us do the needful; let's give three cheers for Dr. Batra and his Padmashree:
HIP HIP  HURRAY
HIP HIP  HURRAY
HIP HIP  HURRAY

Friday, June 15, 2012

4444

My blog's been viewed 4444 times till date today. Thought I'd post it so that I remember the date.

Sunday, March 04, 2012

A-maze-d


Can't say what I felt when I made my way through the maze of narrow alleys between three to four (?) storey high, but otherwise puny houses on either side. The houses on the ground floor opened straight on to the roads. The entrances to the ones above was through dingy, narrow corridors that opened into a big atrium  which was mostly used as parking of scooters and motorcycles, and on one side, the narrow staircase with iron railings. Some houses were cleaner than the others. I saw a guy standing in the balcony above realized that he could shake hands with another guy standing in the balcony across the street; this is how narrow the alley was, no matter how clean. Most houses were clean too but the alley was also intermittently dotted with a wretched shack or two. I glanced at the inside of one while passing it. Phew! I saw a dirty shelf with a dirty gas stove and lots of dirty boxes, a very dirty bed, lots of dirty jackets hanging from pegs on the dirty wall, dozens of gunny sacks from which vegetables peeped out possibly in futile attempt to get a breath of fresh air blowing a few inches away in the alley, and then I saw a man sitting inside covered in a bunch of rags for winter clothes looking outside with a poker face. Unlike the rest of the place, spring season surely hadn’t arrived inside that shack.
  
  Above me, I saw cascades and networks of live wires feeding electricity to the homes. Some of bare joints of these high tension wires looked ominous. I felt the place was much cooler, possibly owing to the lack of sunlight penetrating the closely spaced houses that sure appeared like sky-scrapers on either side as one walked through them. The quiet alley meandered on for a while and led me to a bustling market place with shops for almost everything under the sun, even a halal meat shop. The place smelled nice, of incense or myrrh, even the meat shops didn't stink. In fact, not once did I come across a foul odor in my 10-15 minute walk through this maze, something that I'd expect if I were to see a still or a video of this place. I noticed that at least some of the businesses, of different communities, were flourishing. Some barber shops, general store and few others were bigger than most others and almost impressive. 
  
Suddenly I noticed that every eye, whether that of a man or a woman, was locked on to something moving somewhere ahead of me, the former in distinct lechery and the latter in amused mockery. When I looked I saw a girl walking wearing harem-pants and a casual tee. I walked my way and was glad that I wasn’t a girl in a non-conservative attire. This place didn’t seem safe for a girl that did not look like the others there but what’s surprising about that anyway?

 I came across some construction work going on in full swing. This building, with its modular construction, looked out of place in that area. These were a handful of flats, possibly being constructed for the well-to-do of the area who wished better accommodation within this realm; real-estate business is a money black-hole. However no matter how pretty and modern, inside them, you’d probably have to keep your curtains drawn to not let the reality of the view outside be framed in the pretty windows. This building stood out as abhorrently pretty, tarnishing the humble reality of the place. I don’t know why I described it so much, for I only took a glimpse of it and walked by in a matter of seconds but I did, a deluge of thoughts clogged my near-hypnotized mind. I wondered if living inside those flats would be like wearing beautiful shoes and walking into mud-slush. If one were to ever derive some earthy pleasure out of it, one would need to enter barefoot.

I was relying on my otherwise unreliable internal-compass to lead me out of this universe. I don’t know why I entered it, maybe the cool air from the alley that brushed past my feet—it’s kinda cold to be wearing slippers but I had a reason—made me curious while I was walking on the main road that I do visit once in a while to get the odd job done. It was like a journey through the cross-section of the earth; I entered through the recognizable outside, went into a place stranger than I could’ve imagined and came out on the other side, the recognizable outside again. Somehow, all the turns I took were right and I landed up outside at the spot where I thought I should have been by then. I left the strange little world behind and didn’t care to look back. Maybe I had peeped into those alleys before but I was never tempted to check them out. I wasn’t tempted today either, I was just curious; at times I wonder if they’re flip-sides of the same coin.

I was glad to have come out of that place but I wasn’t unhappy about the ephemeral glide through it either. I snapped out and the reality returned to my veins in a gush, the reality of home, parents and a would-be wife that was awfully busy today in her sister’s ladies-sangeet arrangements…hey where’d I park my bike? It took a whole big second to recall where. I had come this place looking for something and hadn’t found it, I found something else; food for a starved thought. 

Monday, January 16, 2012

fur and fang

Jerry's about to go back to his owners. My sis will be back to collect him in another 2-3 days. I was convinced that my sister's family do not treat him well in that he's not allowed much in the house though he has his own space. They don't pet and touch him much and he's not allowed to meet other dogs. Therefore when they decided to leave Jerry at our place while they were to go to Chennai for my niece's operation, I was overjoyed. I felt like Jerry was gonna be "home", will be well looked after and will get a loving family for two odd weeks. I wasn't completely wrong. Jerry is an adorable two year old cocker spaniel. He even won my father's heart (well almost; my dad is not very fond of dogs).




Initially the problem in handling Jerry was to walk him. My sister's house is bigger than ours, it is on the ground floor unlike ours on the first floor, and there's ample space for Jerry to run around and be happy being a dog. Here, Jerry has to be leashed and taken out to answer his nature's call. Couple that to the facts that he goes berserk on seeing other dogs and wishes to meet them, something I can't allow with stray dogs and other dogs on leash. Jerry is not a big dog but when he pulls, it feels like you're being yanked by a truck. I tried choke chain but stopped using it as I realized he'd pull even if gagged and might eventually strangulate himself unconscious. I learnt how to leash-train dogs and have been mildly successful. It's no longer impossible to walk him around, though it still gets difficult and the sporadic jerks have caused a backache that's not leaving me.

Initially I walked Jerry twice in the morning and twice in the evening and dad took him out once in the afternoon. This wasn't working out with me. I normally wake up at 8:00 am and after Jerry, I was waking up at 4:00am. Jerry was way too playful for my liking after a hard day and to top it all things between dad and I have been a bit sour. The walks were gradually restricted to once in the morning and night and once in the afternoon.

 One night when I was carrying his bedding, he pounced on it, I lost my temper and whacked my hand out hit him, it hit him on the snout and his right eye and he went flying a short distance. Jerry doesn't whine even when hurt but this time a squeak came out of him and he went and sat in a corner. When I calmed down in a few minutes, I felt extremely remorseful of my act. I took Jerry in my arms and he licked my hands (heck! only a dog can be so nice). I checked his eye and his right pupil had shrunk unlike the left one. I freaked out at the thought of hurting the animal. I was almost in tears. I made his bed and watched over him for a long time and hoped that his eye would be ok in the morning. Thankfully it was and I vowed never to hit him again. Since then I've hit him only twice and I made sure that I never hit him hard. I don't have to, he understands when I get angry at his unending silly antics.

Jerry' not an unarmed angel, he's got his arsenal in place. This is the mouth that I put my hand into and the fella holds it very gently.

Another problem was that he wasn't getting much exercise so I had to think of ways for doing it. I play fetch with him, playfully wrestle with him, let him take my hand in his mouth (which he loves doing), feed him, ensure he has clean water to drink at all times and his bed is next to mine. In the morning when he wakes up, he jumps up and licks me out of my dreamworld (which, of late, mostly comprises nightmares). I brush his coat everyday, give him lots of kisses and ensure that he doesn't feel unloved but I also have to ensure that he doesn't start to dominate me so playful wrestling matches generally end with me winning (of course without hurting him in anyway). My room is filled with Jerry's hair everywhere, the bed, the carpet, my clothes. No matter how much you clean, they return in greater number in a matter of an hour or two. My room smells of Jerry and even I smell of Jerry; Jerry doesn't smell so nice.
Jerry: I like covering his eyes with his ears when he's sleepy

Gosh! Jerry gave me a sneak peek into what responsibility of this kind means, he loves me, my parents and my fiance and we all love him being around. Dear Jerry, you will be missed.

shaped up

A quick chat with Anuj today morning brought back some disturbing memories. We were talking about school days and exam times. One topic led to another and I ended up recalling the summer of 1999. In +1 and +2 (1996-98)I was to busy having fun to have paid any attention to studies. Many from my group of friends indulged in unlawful activities. Though I knew my limits and I only used to spend time chatting with having a good time drinking and eating; I completely steered clear of their dark-half and since they kind of knew my dispostions, never involved me in those activities either. Anyway, having passed +2 with "disgraceful" percentage of 56, much of which was contributed by my marks in English rather than any of the science subjects, suddenly the main gate of life was thrown open to me and I didn't know what to do in life.