Tuesday, January 12, 2010

More Binary Digits and hung up brain

110110 (11jan2010)
Surely, as was pointed out, the bits of today are more interesting than yesterday’s. 110110 aha!
It is cold. The cold has been playing havoc on my saneness. My sleep requirement has spiked and despite sleeping more than usual, I wake up tired and confused and remain so throughout the day. It is 9:00p.m. and I just returned from a lab snack at Amrit in Mohali. Something happened that really embarrassed me. After hogging down a massive amount of junk food and having a great time, everyone ready to board the autorick and I headed for my bike when I realized that my keys were missing. I frantically called up the others, lest one of them had accidentally taken them. They all checked but my keys weren’t with anyone. Anuj and Akesh came back to me to hunt for my keys. We looked in every nook and cranny but all in vain. It was finally decided that Akesh would go back with the others while Anuj would stay with me and look around a little more. We’d just been to two places and tracked the whole route very carefully and enquired from every shopkeeper/helper if they’d found a bunch of lost keys. By now a moderate degree of panic had set in me. Without realizing it I was frisking my pockets time and again; this action was irritating Anuj. He ordered me to stop doing so for he said that it would just increase the confusion. He suggested that I empty my pockets once and check them carefully and look elsewhere without going back to the pockets again. That was the right way to do it indeed. I emptied my front pockets and there were no keys inside. I even emptied my laptop bag to find just a laptop and power-chord inside. I again went back inside the restaurant where we ate and doubled check with them; by now those people were also feeling very sorry for me. Outside I saw two guys standing close to my bike and talking in a hushed tone, looking at me once in a while. “That’s it” I thought to myself, “I’ve got the thieves” the more I observed them, the more they seemed to be staring at my bike and glancing at me. I’d already deciphered their plan; they’d make me give up and go away tp seek help and then drive off with my bike. I thought that the only thing left to do now was to call up Ricky and ask him to drive up all the distance with my spare keys, drop Anuj back then go back home; I wasn't going to leave the bike alone. I called up Rick and he told me not to worry and that he’d head out straight away. I glared down at the two men; I was ready for a fist-fight for the first chance I'd get to extract the keys out of them. My confusion was accentuated by the situation, I just couldn’t think straight.Sometimes in hindsight, I surprise myself with how unreasonable I can get. Not that I’m feeling great right now but at least I’m sane enough to know that my thinking got skewed. This very episode has me thinking that maybe I’m mildly schizophrenic.
Then suddenly, as if under the influence of an external force, I put my hand in the back pocket and pulled the out the keys. I stood there dazed, staring at them. Anuj too was stunned and kept staring both at the keys and at me; 45 odd minutes had passed since I raised the alarm and we'd searched everywhere in the chilling cold. Anuj just sighed saying “happens!” I called up Ricky to give him the good news that he wouldn't have to take the trouble afterall. It's 9:00p.m., I' just reached home from the "event" I still feel like I’m not in my senses…the saneness is there somewhere telling me to go to sleep.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

grit in the eye

100110
There’s something special about that way you’d write today’s date. It reminds me of binary digits, the 0s and 1s, the alphabets of the machine language. Anyway, another flipping and pausing through the news channels exposed more irksome events unfolding in politics. Tharoor has made headlines again by supporting the views of British MP, Lord Bhikhu Parekh who, at a lecture at the Indian Council for World Affairs (ICWA) remarked on Nehru’s foreign policies describing them as presenting India in light of moral self-righteousness. Well the media hounds have smelled the odor of controversy well and have started to cover the event even before it has unfurled. Everyone is asking the question, “Will Tharoor will get the bastinado again?” If it happens, it will be very sad because it’ll just prove that the political parties are still overtly moralistic behind their closed doors; of course there are others that are so right in the open, with the people of India supporting them for the same reason. Gandhi and Nehru were great but they were human and it is alright to reflect on their actions for their correctness; there were great things they did for our freedom, so a foreign policy that was self-righteous or moralistic is acceptable for a country that had just gained its independence and was in high spirits, dreaming of a prosperous future. In today’s light, if some actions can be considered as mistakes, they should be accepted as mistakes such that they’re not committed again. Indira Gandhi, a great leader in her own right, was no Mahatma and everyone knows that, her dictatorial actions brought infamy to our land at one point of time but that’s beside the point. The point is to analyze the past, take the good part, learn from the mistakes, and head into the future, forearmed.
There’s the flip side of the politics coin, spearheaded by people like Sanjay Dutt. Today he quit as Samajwadi Party’s General Secretary in response to Amar Singh’s resignation. His speech on the news channel irked me quite a bit. Supporting a member of your party is understandable, quitting and following him/her is understandable too; these are things we’re accustomed to in democracy but to speak like a slave is another. Following is a summary of Dutt’s words:
Amar Singh has given his life for the party. Amar Singh is like his elder brother, if Singh quit, he too “wouldn’t be able to” stay on in the SP. He said he’d go wherever Amar Singh would go (to any other political party). He went on to shamelessly proclaim that he’d do whatever Amar Singh told him to do, even if that meant ending his career in politics.
What kind of logic exists in these statements? When will politicians learn to be objective? I guess that would happen when the people of India demand them to be so. If it weren’t so disgraceful, it would be amusing. This is an elected representative of the people speaking in the most subservient manner possible. How do these people carry out such big jobs that they’ve been gifted by the people of this country? Do they have enough gray matter to do their jobs or are they still in a habit of acting under the given directions; the actor/director relation of the silver screen. They showed Dutt’s popularity on TV while he was on a political rally. He had massive security surrounding him, protecting him from the mob of fans (fanatics) jumping and shouting in a mass hysteria. They were holding banners that said “Munnabhai, dikha do apni Gandhigiri ka kamala”. It was saddening to watch it; they all went and voted for a fictional character. In fact Amar Singh’s entourage consists of other film actors, including Mr. Tiwari (a bhojpuri actor), Jaya Bacchan and Jaya Prada. Tiwari has quit already for the same reason and the two Jaya’s are expected to follow. I understand one brain and one body but one brain and five bodies just seem disproportionate.
Between Dutt and Tharoor, I’d choose Tharoor. What about you?

Life carbureted

I love the fog, I love the cold but by the end of the day it became unbearable. It was foggy throughout the day and the wind-chill on the bike was playing havoc on my fingers, toes and face despite all being covered. I got a K&N installed on the bike today. It was an ordeal but for some reason, the cold mitigated the impact; the wait didn’t feel long despite being so, it felt like I was semi-hibernating. Everything around me seemed to be moving in slow motion, with the Sun nowhere in sight and every passing hour seeming like the hour before it, I wasn’t keeping tab of time either. The owner of PERFORMANCE MOTORR SPORTS in Mohali turned out to be much older than what I’d expected from the voice on the phone. A Sikh ex-serviceman, he was one of those people on whom age doesn’t play havoc of senility. Lean and lanky, he talked like someone in his 30s though he’s probably in his 50s. My love of motorcycles started to spill out in the semi technical conversation that ensued. His name is Gurpreet and I didn’t see his surname mentioned on his business card or when he introduced himself; rather unlikely for Sikhs to do so. He told me that he first ventured into bike tweaking in college when he rebuilt a Triumph from the early 1900s. I doubt if Triumphs were manufactured in those days or maybe the 1913 that I heard was actually 1930. Anyway, his description of the overhaul was captivating, he went on to describe the Czech Jawa and how it got relegated into a Yezdi. I also learnt that “Yezd” is a province in Iran which was the inspiration for the name Yezdi, given to the bike by the Parsi owner of the company who took over Jawa. Jawa was superb, Yedzi wasn’t bad till they gradually compromised on the quality of the bike to an extent that doom was irrevocable. The guy also has a Hyosung Comet, the beautiful Korean Hulk. I’ve just seen one once and it’s a sight to behold. Gurpreet has had a very serious accident on the bike in which he broke his leg. He got banged by a truck and credits his life to the superb stability of the bike. He also has a Willy’s Jeep and Ford Icon amongst others. He told me how he got down to rebuilding the radiator and heating system for the Willy’s and I was mesmerized by the details. We then got down to discussing the Bullet and he was impressed with my (at least theoretical) knowledge on it and my GK on engines. He went to give me a diagrammatic explanation of how air circulates in an engine, something I was oblivious to. Then by the time modifications were carried out to fit the K&N-R1100 and hide it from unwanted attention, we’d talked about many things including a few personal details (ha ha and still no mention of the surname, I liked that). Time flew by and so did my bike when I rode it. I bid goodbye to my new friend and he invited me over for a chat anytime I was free. I rode to the motor-market in the cold. The exhaust and the intake were louder now, I could hear the bike breathing-in very clearly; I hadn’t before. At the motor market, my mechanic wasn’t very pleased at the amount I’d spent. His expressions said that I was crazy to have spent more than 25 times the amount that a regular air-filter comes for (100/- Vs 2600/-), while he charged me peanuts to service the bike. I hope he doesn’t start overcharging me from now, thinking I have some extra cash burning holes in my pocket. I hope he understands that it’s my hobby and passion and I cut other expenses to spend that little extra on my bike after gaining as much knowledge from every corner that can assimilate. If he doesn’t, I’ll look for another. Anyway, after many hours, the sky and the milieu still looked like the time I had left home. I went to the University to eat lunch. It was semi-deserted. The food was good as always and I ate a lot of it. With my jaws, lips and fingers numb from driving a long time in the cold, I had a difficult time, breaking the Laccha parantha, dipping it in Shahi Paneer, bringing it to my mouth, biting it and chewing; the easiest part was to swallow the bolus. It was so cold that I was finding it difficult to keep my hands out and wished for a robotic arm to put the food into my mouth while I kept my hands gloved. The sky dimmed further, not because the sun was setting, it was still 3:30pm, but because the fog became more thick. I reached my Institute and finally my lab to proceed with the experiment. After finishing it, I headed home. It was dark by then. On the way home, I stopped at the Enfield dealer and met the old bunch there, ogled at the new bike models and even spent some time to learn the art of chain tightening; I’m sure I’ll be able to do it on my own the next time. I was cold even inside the house despite wearing a warmer and a sweatshirt. I felt listless at home and didn’t wanna do anything, I didn’t wanna write, didn’t wanna watch TV, didn’t wanna be around my parents. Then I got a call from my girl to check if I was doing alright. That was very sweet of her; she’s in Delhi with her parents to meet the guy they’ve selected as her potential life partner.
K&N installation also requires carburetor re-jetting. Fuel injection’s alright, carburetor’s fun. I’ll buy a bigger pilot jet and main jet from the Royal Enfield Agency and hopefully will manage to fit them on my own. I’ve already opened the carburetor twice before and have a fair idea where the jets are located. It’s actually a very simple job that every carbureted-bike owner must know. It’s daunting at first so you must always do it twice the first time you’re at it. You must know the rules of carburetion to keep it all smooth and running. If you alter air-intake, you have to tweak carburetion. If you alter exhaust, you need to tweak carburetion. Life is but a carburetor.

Friday, January 08, 2010

Thursday, January 07, 2010

All is well

Well what the heck, Chetan Bhagat has finally called it quits. He might not have set a good example but at least this led us to talk about copyrights. It’s a right automatically conferred on the creator of a work of art, music or writing. I understand if he would’ve kept mum and not pursued it but he ‘apologized’; well bahiya if you can read between the lines, “all is definitely is well in the end” BURP!
Real life THREE IDIOTS!

Monday, January 04, 2010

Idiots on the other side

What a coincidence, I wrote about this controversy yesterday and it so happened that in the evening I was in a theatre watching the movie ‘Three idiots’ which I never thought I would. The show was literally served to me on a plate. I generally find it very difficult to sit through a Hindi movie for three odd hours and because they’re mostly based on a trite, convoluted formula, which can be generalized as the first half being funny and enjoyable, and the second grim and morose. Despite conforming to this formula to a certain vague degree, Three Idiots was thoroughly enjoyable. The acting was splendid and the story filled with situations that plague the education system of our times. It even touched upon the aspect of love in a certain admirable way, even if it went a little overboard, but then again, who am I to judge love, anything can happen because everything’s fair in love and war.
I couldn’t help but shed a tear when in the movie, Lobo commits suicide and when one of the idiots is pressurized to an extent that he attempts it. I recalled the horrors that my sister, to some degree, and some of her peers, to a much greater degree, underwent in medical school. It seems that some faculty members turn into conceited sadistic psychopaths who inflict unspeakable mental torture on the students, many a time which also manifests as an economic and mental havoc on the parents of the students. They’re hell bent to make the students bow down and conform to what they feel is right, there’s no room for creative zest, which needs to be harnessed by a kind, intelligent and benevolent teacher; it is subdued with great force and brought down to the general conforming mediocrity. That way, I feel that in India, a student of arts is better placed than a student of science since they can still play around and experiment with creativity, even though to many, it might seem counterintuitive. Parents themselves too are hell bent on goading their kids with the burden of their aspirations and pushing them, many a time, on the wrong leg. The example cited in Three Idiots was apt, “what if Lata Mangeshkar would’ve picked up the cricket bat to play cricket and Sachin Tendulkar would’ve been pushed into a career in singing?”
I have come across an army officer who could’ve been great painters (still is) but waits for his retirement to finally start painting again, there’s a doctor who could’ve been a painter/singer/writer/experimental-biologist but is treating patients without feeling any passion for her work, and there are so many others. What about teachers? Forget school, in the years I studied graduation, almost all the teachers I came acrossvwere doing their job more for earning bread for their family than out of their love for the subject, post grad was better though. This fact was very well reflected in the classes; zoology teachers didn’t know how to pronounce the names of many animals (say Gila Monster) and couldn’t recognize many animals that weren’t there in the specimen jars (thank you Discovery Channel and NGC, my knowledgebase is much wider than theirs), botany teachers told us that Ganesh-ji was the first transgenic and two of the four senior chemistry teachers behavior was inappropriate with the girls in our class, and they did so right under our noses; all this was emetic. I have no problems with anybody’s personal religious belief but caution should be exercised while conducting a science class, it would be just as abhorrent to hear a science teacher giving genetic explanation about Jesus’s ploidy. I once picked up a snake that was killed in the neighborhood and took it to the zoology class to my teacher. I had read about how to identify a poisonous snake from a non-poisonous one but failed to identify this one correctly, I wanted my teacher to fill me up on this. Her reaction surprised me; she freaked out but tried her best to hide her terror. I had to pay for these “mistakes” in the form of psychological pressures; I had made the teacher look bad. I earned a bad name amongst the faculty members; I was the scalawag. I never enjoyed their classes and at times expressed it in a subdued way; more trouble. It was immature on my part to start bunking classes, what I should’ve done was excelled in the subjects but by not doing so I just opened the door to bad times. I started to ignore studies and did something worse; I fell in love with a girl (and earned some more bad name!). I wonder if life would’ve been easier as a gay. There was love and war going on at the same time and I was taking a beating from all corners. Zoology, the first complicated word I had spelt in my life at a very young age and yearned to pursue as a career, wasn’t as interesting to me anymore.
The only channels I still watch on TV are Discovery, National Geographic and Animal Planet, I love clicking animals, love drawing them, still love going to the zoo, and I still fancy the idea of living in a jungle and studying wildlife but now I study proteins almost 10-12 hours a day in a lab. I am so thankful for it, for this too is very interesting. When the teachers of the college, from where I did bachelors, found out that I’d made it through the entrance exam to MSc (and none of their dear students had except one that got a paid 'NRI' seat), they weren’t too please (these were my teachers). Later when they found out that I’d cleared two PhD scholarship exams and even done well in GRE, the gentlemen from the chemistry department said that I probably had “contacts”; they were in absolute denial. Do I despise them? oh yes I do! In fact in all the years of education, I’ve loved PhD the most and I’m so glad that I didn’t quit after graduation.
Anyway, the movie was great. Only that they threw caution to the wind when they made that vacuum contraption; they obviously have no idea about the omnipresent dangers of the microbial world, of how quickly life-threatening infection can set in under such circumstances (that's why an operation-theatre is aseptic as opposed to a film-theatre) and the kind of training it takes to be an obstetrician who can manage a complicated delivery but despite all that, it was thoroughly entertaining. Last but not least, I loved the red Volvo SUV (I think that insignia on the grill was that of a Volvo but I’m not certain) in which they drove around in Shimla, Manali and Leh.

Saturday, January 02, 2010

Khan Bhakti

Come New Year and controversies cannot be too far behind. I switched the TV on today morning and while surfing through the channels, paused at the one of the otherwise avoidable Hindi news channels. Ah! There’s the Mumbai senior police officer caught on tape, dancing at a party organized by a seasoned convict, a Don, who was let out of jail after many years. Why do policemen get to have all the fun? Had my parents sensitized me to the harsh realities of the world very early on, I would’ve worked hard from a very young age to get into either The Civil Services, The Police Services or the best of all, Politics. Of course for the latter, I’d have to change my name to something more acceptable. I mean, how popular is George Fernandes. Ah! Can’t say, maybe he just didn’t have the caliber of Manmohan Singh, the following of Vajpayee, the pedigree of a Gandhi or simply the charisma of…err…err…Mayawati (well at least for the people of her constituency)??!! There were rumors going around that she might become Prime Minister; have people lost their minds? But then I feel that without mindless people, rumors wouldn’t exist.
However I’m glad my parents didn’t do that, I can now sit in the balcony on a cold, foggy winter morning and judge the world on my keyboard while the birds sing the morning ragas and nudge me to write some more. What bliss!
Anyway, lets move on to the more interesting controversy; Aamir Khan Vs Chetan Bhagat. I appreciate them both to a certain degree but am no fan of either. In fact I used to like Khan much more than Bhagat till I saw the news today. Khan and Bhagat pitted against each other, the former calling this a publicity stunt and the latter demanding acknowledgement for the script of Khan’s blockbuster hit, “THREE IDIOTS”.
Khan was addressing a press conference and very confidently saying that this was a controversy generated by a very publicity-hungry man. The media should put a stop to all this and not let him succeed anymore than he already has.
Bhagat says that the movie is no less than 25-30% directly copied from his novel, “FIVE POINT SOMEONE”, which includes one liners, dialogues etc.
The fans on both sides are at war too, Bhagat’s claiming that the story is 80% copied from the novel and Khan’s referring to Bhagat as a publicity beggar. Sometimes I feel that it’s the high powered fans in our attics that need to be subdued first (read fanatics).
I have neither read the novel nor watched the movie but have met people that swear by both, I will therefore only focus on the claims of the controversy. Indians don’t really care about copyrights unless they’re brought to task. Unlike the west where it’s a serious offence even at the school level, plagiarism in India, is a subject of little importance everywhere from schools, colleges and even publishing houses. We therefore, are brought up to disregard it. We have a system in which the teachers would give us less marks if we form our own sentences and put in our thoughts into what we study. Verbatim reproduction of the book sentences is rewarded and creativity is nipped in the bud. So was the case till the time I completed post graduation, some five years ago. Interaction with students has revealed that the situation is no better now. Bhagat alleges that there’s not as much as a mention of his name in the acknowledgement of the movie. The script writers of the movie acknowledged on TV that the movie has been inspired from Bhagat’s book but a lot has been altered. This situation is analogous to what they call reverse engineering in IT terms, something that’s a serious copyright offense. You pick up someone else’s creation, say MS-Windows, crack it’s code and manipulate it here and there to form an operating system that you claim is your creation. Then, if you have no fear of the law, you go on to sell it as your own creation with no mention of Microsoft anywhere. I assure you, Microsoft will nail you hard enough for you to suffer some serious soft-tissue damage (read brain).
We need to educate ourselves more on Copyrights, Trademarks and Patents and I suggest that everyone who has an access to a computer and the internet, visit the website www.wipo.org and spend some time to enroll for their free coursework. It’s not very lengthy or time consuming and it will definitely add to your knowledgebase towards the contemporary world of patents and copyrights. You’re given ample time to finish the course, if you’re mildly tenacious, you shouldn’t have a problem. If that is too much for you, you can search the net for these subjects but like everything on the internet, search only websites run by authentic agencies. WIPO is an arm of the UN and therefore the contents of the website are authentic. So they never taught you in a lucid manner why cheating is bad, I guess they’re right when they say, it’s never too late to learn. Many sleeping consciences out there might even wake up; knowledge empowers.
With the movie makers accepting on TV that the story has been inspired from Bhagat’s book, not acknowledging it in the movie was an unconscionable act. It is wrong on Aamir Khan’s part to attack Bhagat saying that he’s just doing it for cheap publicity and there are laws in place to prove that. It seems like Khan, like most of us, neither has the knowledge, nor the conscience to give regard to someone else’s creativity. Some news channels are “implying” that Bhagat is doing it for money; I never heard him claim any money in any of the conferences they aired; he should. So is Khan one of those people who know how to mint money using soft targets present in the brains of the general public (who can forget Taare Zameen Pe and Rang De Basanti). Make them weep, make them cry and make them pay while you happily drive to the bank in your big SUV. I would like to think otherwise; I’ve been his admirer for the past 22 years since the release of “Qyamat se Qyamat tak” (despite finding him a little too stiff, even today, while delivering dialogues but maybe that’s his Style).

New day, new year

Last night’s New Year party at IMTECH was FUN. When I reached, the program was nearing the end of its first hour. There were titles to be given out and I wasn’t really sure if I was gonna win anything. I presumed if I’d win any, it’d probably be the “colgate smile of IMTECH”. However I didn’t, I won the title “Jack Of All Trades”. Thankfully it didn’t mention the rest of the adage “…and master of none”. After they handed down the title, the host asked me to reveal anyone of my ‘traits’, I chose to sing (I was mentally prepared for that). I sang the famous Hindi song “papa kehete hain”. I started from the second stanza, pointing to the audience I started off “baithe hain mil ke, sab yaar apne….” and the crowd cheered and started singing along from the very next line “koi engineer ka kaam karega…” and then the chorus and I stopped and did not sing the next stanza (my favorite) “mera to sapna…”. I took my prize and walked off to a cheering, whistling crowd; I was elated. Then came another call on the stage, this time I was paired with Anuj (my senior) along with two other pairs and we were asked to act like two components of the instruments we use in our regular work. I was asked to act like a centrifuge talking to a centrifuge tube (Anuj). From the others, one pair was asked to be pipette and pipette tip and the other, a spectrophotometer and a cuvette. Of course Anuj and I were the quickest to start (~5seconds from the time we were given instructions) and the best of the rest (hee haa haa haa). I started off by shouting dus hazaar, dus hazaar, dus hazaar (ten thousand, ten thousand, ten thousand) mentioning the rotation speed of the centrifuge, like a conductor shouts the destination of a long route bus. Then I shouted at anuj “kitni savaari hai bhai?” (how many passengers?) hinting to the number of tubes to be placed in the centrifuge. Anuj shouted back “battees, bhai sahib” (thirty two brother). I shouted back “chalo charah do saari jaldi jaldi” (ok load em up quickly). Then Anuj shouted “bhaiya thodi dheere chalana, cell pellet karne hai, DNA nahi.” (bro move slowly, we need to pellet cells, not DNA). I replied “fikar not” (don’t worry) and then Anuj and I held each other hands and started running in circles, implying that the centrifuge had started. The crowd howled and cheered on.
Anuj won the title of Mr. Charming and Akesh and Rajni (also from my lab), won the Mr. and Ms. Workaholic titles. So out of all the labs in IMTECH, our lab bagged the maximum prizes and we dominated the dance floor too. At 12:00 midnight we paused the dancing to cut the New Year cake and wish each other. Then there was another round of maddening dancing. Only that by 1:00 am, I had no energy left and could barely stand. It was freezing cold outside, I was drenched in sweat and I was supposed to ride back home on my motorcycle; I did. Today I spent the day hiding from the boss and sleeping anywhere I could, out of his sight. Shit! My body is totally stiff and my neck feels like a piece of brittle wood.
When I went to the toilet in the evening, Dr. Kumaran was peeing. He asked me in a hushed tone “did you get drunk last night?”
I replied “No, not really. Two pegs just get me mildly high. It wasn’t even enough to keep my warm. I had to dance for the warmth but I had a great time.”
He said “Well I did. Dr. Ganguli, I and a few others got totally whacked out last night. I got that drunk after a long time.”
I laughed and said “Oh so that’s why Dr. Ganguli looked the way he did today morning.”
“Oh yeah! Surely” he said giggling.
It’s nice to interact with these cool scientists who’ve returned very recently from the US. I hear most of them are cool for a few years till the Indian system shoves the fake pride into them and they all walk with their noses lifted high in the air. But I doubt that Dr. Kumaran and Dr. Ganguli will become like that.